Today at lunch, I spontaneously went out with two colleagues. Both are in their late twenties, educated, blonde, and attractive - and both professionally as well as - I realized during lunch - privately very ambitious. One of them mentioned that she believes her boyfriend might soon pop the question. And I briefly thought about recommending Guerlain's Le Plus Beau Jour de Ma Vie for the big day. But then she mentioned that she had recently reminded him of the 'Three Months' Salary Rule' - just to make sure he wouldn't do anything foolish. I must admit I wasn't familiar with this rule - at least not as a contemporary tool - and felt a bit pitying - as if I were living under a rock - to be informed that the engagement ring must cost three months' salary of the man. This comes from the idea that after the marriage promise, one might already give oneself to the other - but not before? I don't think so - and if he were to leave you, you would be 'damaged goods' and at least have the ring as a little consolation. I tilted my head slightly and studied the two of them, thinking: 'Germany 2017 - wow.' And I was glad that I hadn't told her about Guerlain and its beautiful wedding fragrance.
I can't exactly remember the price of Le Plus Beau Jour de Ma Vie, but I'm pretty sure it was well under five hundred euros - and thus far from the expectations of the two young ladies. I still recall thinking while testing it - that spring in a Guerlain store in Paris - what a wonderful engagement gift the pretty little bottle with the spray nozzle would surely make. In my comment on Le Bouquet de la Mariée, I described the fragrance - Extrait and Eau de Parfum hardly differ for me - it is a perfume full of tenderness and joy of life and full of abundance. As bright as jubilant sugar and lively as white and pale pink butterflies - and completely innocent and one who wants nothing to do with 'three months' salary' and 'damaged goods', but only with a promise for a whole life - in good times and in bad - of laughter and kisses at the altar, of doves and rose arches, of clinking champagne glasses and proud parents - the mother of the bride in apricot, the mother of the groom in lilac or pale turquoise - and the very best friend who catches the bridal bouquet at the end.
Conclusion: I almost felt a bit sorry for the future groom. But surely he is such a blonde-haired lad with a Barbour jacket and a hunting license - and the pity faded away. And when she walks down the aisle next spring with him and her one-carat from Maximilianstraße, Goethestraße, or Neuer Wall, she will know nothing of Guerlain and its beautiful wedding fragrance. And that's good.
Good that you didn't mention the poetry of Guerlain.
I've never heard of the three-month salary rule either. Marriage as a business, that has to be seen from both sides. You combine your assets and later remain in an open marriage even when you actually want a divorce... to keep the inherited and earned wealth together for the descendants. That's very bourgeois thinking and far from any romance, which is supposedly "a German invention."
I had to laugh heartily at the “..blonde-haired guy with a Barbour jacket and a hunting license” and I know exactly what type of “man” you had in mind. It’s always shocking to see what some women expect from a man while offering nothing but unrealistic demands themselves.. Sad world. But your great comment really made me curious about the scent, even though I've already experienced the best day of my life :)
I'm shocked. There are still (young) women today who practically sell their virginity, seeing themselves as bridal merchandise?!? Ugh. And there are men who find women like that attractive? Yikes. - But I liked your comment.
I completely understand why you didn't want her to have the scent. Such a romantic perfume is only suitable for a wedding that focuses on the most important things in life, not on business savvy. Moreover, I find your surprise so charming when a modern man encounters chauvinism in female form.
What a wonderful social study of modern times - and contrasted with the redemption of an innocent fragrance and an innocent feeling - beautifully described!
I rolled my eyes when I read that! As an "older model," I wonder what we women fought for in our youth. But this just confirms my impression that humanity doesn't learn anything; history keeps repeating itself. - One can only hope that her future partner realizes the truth from such statements and runs away. So instead of "damaged goods," it should say on their tombstone "never opened." She truly deserves it!
Then I wish the lady all the best for her marriage and hope that the phrase "in good times and bad" isn't just empty talk in their relationship - or will the groom be swapped out if things get a bit tight financially?
That deserves a big romance trophy. I'm not envious of your work environment. The term 'damaged goods' makes me wonder if I should consider myself an antique at my age-after all, those go for quite a different price. I really need to discuss this with my (husband) partner.
Well, welcome to the 21st century... have we perhaps lost our way?! In my eyes, it has nothing to do with emancipation, but simply with greed. I'm totally with BeatriceA. And with that comment about the old "in good times and in bad," with or without bling. Thanks!
"That's why you should check who you bind yourself to forever..."! Otherwise, I completely agree with BeatriceA: there are always people trying to squeeze (material) benefits out of all sorts of situations. For me, the woman's described intentions have nothing to do with "caveman thinking"; I believe it's more of a modern custom among certain social classes... the future husband proudly shows off on his smartphone what he has "bought for his sweet."
@BeatriceA: Whether the lady believes in such nonsense or not is secondary: Just the fact that she resorts to such an outdated cliché as a crutch for her argument shows how she thinks. At best, she seems opportunistic to me. It's cringe-worthy!
You don't really think she believes in "damaged goods," do you? That phrase just gives her a chance to gain an advantage. I'm sure she can be "emancipated" too-at the moment it leads to success.
Wow, this rule is making me feel sick! I recently read that the emancipation movement in Germany was all for nothing. After reading your comment, I really believe it. Here’s a link to that rule I had never heard of until now: http://www.traumtage.de/verlobungs-und-trauringe/171-designerdiamonds-2
What category do you belong to if you haven't even reached "damaged goods" by a certain age? C-grade, fallen fruit, or unsellable/unbuyable? ;)
I had a good laugh... thank you and the romance trophy! :)
So you don't think she deserves the scent because of her "old-fashioned" attitude, or how should I understand the comment? Just a question for clarification... no attack or judgment...
That's truly crazy to hear something like this in 2017. On the other hand, there are still women whose only life goal is to get married. I can't understand that, but I also come from a family where very different values were instilled, like having the courage to follow your own path. I find someone who voluntarily lives as limited as described to be foolish and embarrassing.
I completely agree with Turandot! THAT is not what we meant by equality and the equal value of women and men. It's about freedom and mutual respect: selfishness, cold-heartedness, purely material thinking, yes, greed. Shaking my head! However, anyone who thinks like that: They do not truly love their potential future partner, clearly, with or without equality; it will just be a marriage of convenience, and engagement and wedding will only be a performance.
I've never heard of the three-month salary rule either. Marriage as a business, that has to be seen from both sides. You combine your assets and later remain in an open marriage even when you actually want a divorce... to keep the inherited and earned wealth together for the descendants. That's very bourgeois thinking and far from any romance, which is supposedly "a German invention."
This comment is amazing and has moved me to tears, even though you probably won’t find out - basically post parfumo.
Moreover, I find your surprise so charming when a modern man encounters chauvinism in female form.
Lovely scent description, thanks :)
I had a good laugh... thank you and the romance trophy! :)
https://youtu.be/N5kWu1ifBGU