Bois Doré Van Cleef & Arpels 2017

i had when i was 11 years old, when i was with my dad. he remarried and i waited for moments alone with him. between us there was this silence in which so much emotion was screaming. so child i did not dare to say what i felt - later not to spare him. at 19 he took his own life.

christmas... everything is so festive and people are so careful in their dealings with each other. coffee and cake, christmas music, quiet conversations of trivialities - the typical hwg sentences. and if you are very quiet you can hear the pain behind it. old man... vca gave me a nice slap in the face with this credenz.

now i am sitting here with bois dorè on my arm and sniffing through the memories. with my neck tied and my cheeks wet. a good little therapy water to get rid of the "old burden"....

... such scents are 2 more that flash me. haeven from chopard - my first man who died too early and sun man from e.arden - my second one who fell in love with me.