Parfumo/Fragrantica

Maybe it is the Jones thing Cryptic. I have photos to back mine up. LOL

To be honest, those perfume games personally annoy me (although I have posted in them in the past). I think Parfumo has a more mature population, whereas Fragrantica has more girly/younger people posting there than here. It's by no means a negative thing; just something I noticed.

There is a lot of information concerning fragrances, houses, noses, and sheep that I have learned playing the game. My crossword puzzles keeps my brain active too.

It was good to see your take on it Hayven. Thanks for your honest thoughts.

This gets to the heart of the reason why I left Basenotes. I found it too big, messy and chaotic. Post the most benign opinion on BN and you may find yourself attacked in the most snarky, patronizing way. It's a fragrance frat house.

Speaking of frat house analogies, the Basenotes system itself is the software equivalent of a dilapidated frat house: BN is constantly crashing and down for maintenance. Compare that to the clean, easy to use and intuitive system here on Parfumo. Without even knowing what might happen, just click any link or icon on a page and you'll be amazed at what you will learn.

I actually prefer our small, friendly and considerate community on Parfumo. While activity may occasionally droop, I sort of dread the notion of Parfumo becoming too large. Far from seeming "cold" I've found nothing but warmth and camaraderie here. Witness how new members to Parfumo are welcomed and encouraged to participate. My experience on Basenotes was just the opposite. Geez, I apparently I still have some baggage from that divorce! I still sneak around to use the "Notepad" portion of their forum.

Finally, Lola82 I'm so glad you're part of Parfumo. I love reading your reviews (I'm one of your subscribers) and your forum responses always have a unique perspective. I hope you know how much we appreciate you as a member!

Perfectly put, Greysolon!

Bravo!

Yes, I agree with this completely! I was always afraid to post something on basenotes, as there is a lot of sarcasm, and snobbery there. I still go and read posts, if it is something that interests me, but don't participate anymore. I also felt that you weren't part of the "club" or Frat, as you put it), if you didn't have hundreds of niche perfumes. Not everyone can afford niche fragrances, and others just don't have access to many of these fragrances. I love reading about them, and sometimes get samples, but I know my limits, and what is affordable to me. I really never felt comfortable on Basenotes, and I was even nervous to write a review. It does seem to be a very closed, and clicky group.

Everyone else is probably aware of this already, but I just noticed that Parfumo has more fragrances in the directory (23,665) than Fragrantica (17,375). That's fantastic.

It seems to be human nature to congregate in groups. Like souls bond with like pals. With the facility of communicating via the keyboards from your cozy home computer corner to wherever your fancy takes you, there is opportunity to connect where you want to be. Others feel the same way, and that is, theoretically, a great big mish-mash.

But no, not so fast. When entering a discussion group, you enter into an already existing group climate. That climate changes, as new members step in. It changes even more when the group becomes massive. Here I am thinking of both Basenotes and Fragrantica.

There is a lack of control and topics escalate. Even on the smaller, more contained Parfumo stage, the German site is larger and has not only more life, but also more strife.

So it seems we cannot have a perfect Forum, a perfect group, a perfect world. Either apply strict rules and that kills all spontaneity, or hang around with loose rules which tolerate nonsense and bla bla.

I am happy about the perfume interaction and the blog article feature.

If we could all leave our egos at the front door when entering the home of Parfumo and respect our host and all members while giving our voice to our topics at hand while agreeing or disagreeing, we would have a perfect forum.

Ditto.
And simply bypass topics that annoy you without comment.

Parfumo is a smaller community, and the coldness that others have spoken of is more a reflection of seriousness, than of lack of caring. Personally, that's totally ok with me. I'd rather have a more-serious discussion among fragrance nerds than the battle royale among the ignorant that Fragrantica is. I had no problem with Basenotes' atmosphere (high T levels were a welcome change), but I didn't like that my reviews had to be approved. That and the site's maintenance problems left me dissatisfied.

I think new topics or games or other things are fine, as long as they were options. I would just hate for Parfumo to become frivolous.

I know everyone hates the sexy perfume threads, but I always thought it was hilarious that there could be 2 or 3 "Man Magnet" threads going on in Fragrantica's Female Perfume forum quite peacefully, but every time some hapless guy posted a "Pantydropper" thread in the Men's Forum, all hell would break loose.

That is really funny.

I never spent enough time in the forum over there to notice. The place reminded me too much of New York City, to be honest.

Ditto...ditto.

Not to go all Pollyanna and group hug gooey...
This thread is a great example of why most of us have chosen Parfumo as our fragrant home. The thread has gone from the seed of Lola82's simple observation that she'd like to see Parfumo become a more fun, friendly place and has grown into a civil discussion of what we would like Parfumo become as it evolves. This is an important discussion because short of developing the internet's version of a constitution, the "Terms of Use" contract, it's the unspoken yet generally understood level of acceptable behavior from the membership that ultimately sets the tone for any forum or social network.

The consensus attitude that seems to guide the considerate and civil home we find here on Parfumo is best summed up by the previous posts from Cincy and Digindirt:

Cincy's statement that, "If we could... when entering the home of Parfumo... respect our host and all members while giving our voice to the topics at hand while agreeing or disagreeing..."

And Digindirt's reminder that it might be preferable to "...simply bypass topics that annoy you without comment."

Those two points are basically the Golden Rule. Thankfully I see this level of civility and kindness exhibited on Parfumo every day. If each of us continue to exemplify this attitude of mutual respect then it will be understood to everyone joining our membership that this is the foundation of Parfumo.

Or, at least, that's my hope. I have an annoyingly optimistic, golden retriever outlook on life. Damn, I brought up that contentious dog vs. cat thing again

HUGE +1 from me ...

I believe that we have already resolved the cat-dog conflict!

Well, I am busy posting on both the German site and the International site.
It happens that vivid and almost violent discussions ensue when the topic is religion or politics.
Other Forums forbid those discussions because too many different opinions will be expressed and invariably somebody's feelings will be insulted.
In the most recent stormy exchange on the German site, Management quickly stepped in and fixed it. A troll was banned. But he was not the only cause for strife, it was the general attitude of quickly attacking instead of listening to other opinions.
This morning the attitude and policy of Parfumo was published, after the storm was settled, to show us "the way". That is much better than simply deleting the topic as it has happened countless times in Fragrantica, leaving the crowd baffled, haplessly angry, and members quitting in disgust.
I appreciate the attitude of Parfumo to let us know what the climate should be.

P, when you talk about Parfumo publishing a policy are you referring to the way an issue was handled/resolved on the German site or did I miss something?

Yes, there was a religious topic which made waves. The words got ugly. The members were reminded to keep peace even if opinions differ. The topic is still open. In Fragrantica it would have been deleted without notice and everybody left hanging.

Now I have to go read it--a good way to practice my German!

If Parfumo is now spoken of as 'the other place' can we assume it has arrived?

It's beginning to look that way! I have seen quite a few regulars coming over...all the better, as long as it stays calm, and informative..a kind of happy medium. ( I wish everything could be ideal)