A typical Sunday morning. Enjoying a cozy breakfast, wasting a little time, then the weekend beauty routine, and to top it all off, a few spritzes from the perfume collection, this time even a brand new, untested fragrance: 67 Artemisia by Pomellato.
Wow, the very first whiff transports me to a paint shop, somehow a gentle hint of thinners...
Oh well. First, the new fax-copy-scanner needs to be installed. A small task. Here we go.
First, I have to wrestle the monster weighing at least 5 kilos out of the box. No problem, I can handle it.
Goodness, it’s really stuck in there...this stupid Styrofoam...there...slips...yes...not...a...thing...So...much...damn...mess!!!!
Put it down. Breathe. Next attempt. I can do this!
Uuuuuaaaaarrrrrgggghhhhhh!!!! This can NOT BE TRUE!! Did they glue the 8-kilo colossus in the box for shipping?!?!
Another pause. Catch my breath. Wipe the sweat.
Oh, now it doesn’t smell like solvents anymore (though maybe those could help right now), but rather citrus-fresh, a bit bitter, and above all minty. Really pleasant and refreshing.
Well then, let’s go for a third “I-will-get-you-out-of-this-damn-box” attempt.
GET OUT OF THERE ALREADY, YOU RIDICULOUS PIECE OF CRAP!
Well, there we go. It’s out. The box may be destroyed, shattered, partially atomized Styrofoam is flying around my office like in a winter wonderland. But the monster weighing at least 10 kilos is out of the packaging! Wonderful! And right at the bottom of the package, a little note flutters towards me, showing the eager buyer how to get Thor’s hammer out of the packaging. Are they trying to PISS ME OFF?!?!?!?!
A short anger-breathing break, another sweat-wipe.
Mmmh, again I catch a whiff of tart lemon mint, but now mixed with something herbal-green, not hay-dry, but juicy-green and above all not too overpowering. Very pleasant. And soothing.
Alright, the 12-kilo beast has to go on the desk, no way around it. And: Heeeeppppp! Oh...man...is...this...piece of crap...heavy! Breathe, breathe, pfff, pfff, and .... heppa....up on the desk.
Damn, how heavy such a 15-kilo chunk can be!!! And it’s supposed to just fax, copy, scan, and print!!! Man, oh man!
Feeling top fit, I take a tiny breather on the exercise ball (it’s much better for the back than an old office chair, and let’s not even talk about comfort).
And out of habit, my wrist wanders to my nose: What a soothing and refreshing calm! While the bitter-citrus mint freshness is still there, a gentle woody note now joins the herbal-green. Olive wood? No idea? I would have spontaneously guessed birch from the smell, but at least it’s woody. A really pleasant, unobtrusive scent.
A glance at the 20-kilo block on my desk reminds me to connect Mr. Colossus, after all, I urgently need to copy to continue working later. Alright, let’s connect it. Where the hell is that damn cable? And where does this need to go...OWWWW!!! That DAMN DESK EDGE!
WHAT A PIECE OF CRAP#%$¥*&@#%+£$#&@?!#% ......!!!!!!!!!
(Censorship follows)
BIIIEEEEP BIEPBIEP BIIIIIEEEP.
After what felt like 2 hours of a Tourette attack, the copier is now running.
‘Do you want to install your printer on your PC?’
NO!!!! I DO NOT WANT TO!!!!!
Come on, breathe, don’t get worked up, stay calm, sniff your wrist again. Aaaahhhh, yes, that feels good, like an herb meadow in the morning dew, with mint, lemon balm, a bit of fresh wood.
As I said: A typical Sunday morning, cozy, relaxed, and chill. And with a great scent! What more could you want?!