Cypress
Fir balsam
Rosemary
White fir
Douglas fir
Oakmoss
Opoponax
Mandarin orange
Nutmeg
Tonka butter
BeJot
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BeJot
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18
The Key to the Soul
This morning I applied it for the first time, just a drop, since I have so little. A bit disappointed, I perceived rosemary and cypress, but no fir balsam. However, I really liked the combination of the two and after the initial longing, I was rewarded with a pleasant spiciness that I had never experienced before.
Now, this evening, the second attempt. Strange: Immediately the balsamic fir was there. Like a flood right into the heart. I had to really hold back, and then I could again recognize the rosemary and especially the cypress. Why this difference? Was I in a different mood? Yes! I had just come from my sister-in-law and brother-in-law, who is demented. And I was emotionally preoccupied with aging and illness. And suddenly I had to pull myself together to avoid crying. Again and again, my nose goes to my sleeve. As if it seeks comfort there. But finds only more sadness. It runs very deep. Or rather, it unexpectedly rises from deep layers. Sometimes it's a lump in the throat, sometimes it drives tears to the edge of my eyelids. Then again, a deep sigh goes all the way down to my belly. A throbbing in my lips.
And now I understand: The scent is a gift! I am just unwrapping it. It wants to take away the hustle and bustle of the last weeks, to lead me back to myself. For that, I must be ready to accept myself as I am. With my pain of aging. With my worry of not being up to the challenges of tomorrow. And again tears come, and I see the text I am trying to write blur on the display.
It doesn't matter. The review by Floyd in my head makes it clear to me which key I have turned with the scent…
And suddenly Key shows its other facets: It becomes brighter, happier again. Or is it me? I smell flowers and grass. I dive into mossy forest soil. And a lot of balsam envelops my soul…
IS THIS A SCENT! IS THIS A GIFT!
I take it with me into the night.
(With thanks to Camey5000)
Now, this evening, the second attempt. Strange: Immediately the balsamic fir was there. Like a flood right into the heart. I had to really hold back, and then I could again recognize the rosemary and especially the cypress. Why this difference? Was I in a different mood? Yes! I had just come from my sister-in-law and brother-in-law, who is demented. And I was emotionally preoccupied with aging and illness. And suddenly I had to pull myself together to avoid crying. Again and again, my nose goes to my sleeve. As if it seeks comfort there. But finds only more sadness. It runs very deep. Or rather, it unexpectedly rises from deep layers. Sometimes it's a lump in the throat, sometimes it drives tears to the edge of my eyelids. Then again, a deep sigh goes all the way down to my belly. A throbbing in my lips.
And now I understand: The scent is a gift! I am just unwrapping it. It wants to take away the hustle and bustle of the last weeks, to lead me back to myself. For that, I must be ready to accept myself as I am. With my pain of aging. With my worry of not being up to the challenges of tomorrow. And again tears come, and I see the text I am trying to write blur on the display.
It doesn't matter. The review by Floyd in my head makes it clear to me which key I have turned with the scent…
And suddenly Key shows its other facets: It becomes brighter, happier again. Or is it me? I smell flowers and grass. I dive into mossy forest soil. And a lot of balsam envelops my soul…
IS THIS A SCENT! IS THIS A GIFT!
I take it with me into the night.
(With thanks to Camey5000)
15 Comments
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