Phenomakos

This is not a beachy scent — there's no sunscreen, no sunshine, no sand. This is briny ocean water, churning with an incoming storm on the distant horizon. The sky is overcast and water sprays into the air as waves crash against the old docks. There is a freshness to the scent, but instead of a crisp blue it's soft and grayed like your favorite shirt after years of washing. This is a cozy kind of storm, not a threatening one. (For now, at least.) You could go for a walk, if you don't mind the damp air and the gusting wind.

In the background there's a wisp of sakura blossom. The floral note is made edgy and very unisex by the brine, adding a nice twist to the scent that lifts it and makes it much more interesting than if it were simply ocean water. There's also a hint at things below the water's surface, at the coral and deep sea life. It's fragile and elegant, porcelain-like. It's the faint scent of a kiln-dried ceramic piece after it has been plunged into water. This note is easy to miss and might be more of a personal association than anything, but it's persistent once I notice it.

I have the water mist version of this fragrance. It's light, but has good longevity. This is a linear fragrance that stays pretty much the same throughout its wear. This combination of traits makes it really great for layering — I really enjoy using it to add a bit of edge other fragrances. (Jo Malone's Peony & Blush Suede becomes more dark and a bit masculine; Replica's Soul of the Forest becomes ozonic while also being softened slightly with the hint of floral, giving a sense of petrichor.)

After smelling Garden Charm from this brand, I was expecting to hate this. Instead it was surprisingly fine! (After it dries down at least. The initial perfumers alcohol scent is intense.) Way less sweet than I had assumed it would be and stays pretty close to the skin. It's quite straightforward — definitely a gently toasted marshmallow, not one fresh out of the bag or heavily roasted. It's mostly the lightly golden crust, not the gooey melted inside, and I think that's why I found it a little bit likable. How simple it is makes it seem like it might be good for layering, for someone who's really into this type of scent. This is not realistic marshmallow. This is not complex. This is a $10 TJ Maxx perfume and it smells like exactly that.

Be warned that it stayed really oily on my skin, so I'd hesitate before spraying this on clothing.

Overall it's a really cute bottle and probably an okay cheapie, but there's definitely better out there. Resist the cute label. Get something else.

The bottle is cute and I thought it might be simple and fresh, but nope. This scent is like... an off brand hand cream scent knocking off a Bath & Body Works scent. Somehow cloying, despite being the type of citrus-y scent profile that usually skews light. It tries to be green, but it's too afraid to actually capture it. Instead there's a sickening sweetness to the cucumber melon notes and I ended up scrubbing it off. I actually had to scrub my hand with a few products and do multiple washes, as regular hand soap didn't remove it. Surprising staying power.

Be warned that it stayed really oily on my skin, so I'd hesitate before spraying this on clothing.

The initial smoke is assertive, but not too much. Instead of woody, natural smoke, to me it smells more like lighter fluid. There's a kind of sharp, synthetic burn to the smoke note that has a surprisingly perfume-y edge to it. Like a classic perfume that has been set on fire.

The vanilla is overwhelming for me. It's a saccharine vanilla, too sweet. The excessive sweetness makes it smell quite cheap to me, like low quality grocery store cookies. This note sweeps in very quickly and takes over, drowning out everything else. I get little to none of the other notes, unfortunately. Maybe a hint of pepper hiding in the lingering wisps of smoke?

I LOVE clove and I'm so sad that I can't smell it at all, at any point. I'd really love to be able to smell the juniper too — balancing all this heaviness with something fresh would be such a relief.

I don't think By The Fireplace is for me, but I can see what people like about it. The way it's blended smells kind of muddy to me, in the same way that a lot of designer fragrances smell muddy to me — too much all at once in a way that is both overstimulating and flat. The particular way in which it's made for mass appeal is something that rarely works for me. That said, it smells kind of incredible paired with the fabric softener scent on my shirt? More cashmeran and juniper and maybe I could have been really into this.

The opening is gorgeous — bright and fruity with effervescent champagne and just a hint of lipstick on the rim of the glass. Like the first sip of a drink. It smells like strawberries to me. Juicy. Fresh. Not candy. But it's the fizzy champagne note that has me huffing my wrist. Instead of overdone booziness there's a giggly lightness to it that smells the way champagne feels. Really great.

Unfortunately those good bits are extremely fleeting and only last a matter of minutes on me. It quickly turns to dry, generic powder. Inoffensive, I guess. I love florals, but they feel so vacant here. Nothing exciting remains. If there were even just a hint of the initial fruitiness then that would be something, but there's no joy to it. It's as if it's actively trying to not have any personality; the date you're on is not a very good one. There's no warmth to it. You got all dressed up for nothing.

If the five minute opening were maintained for even an hour or two, then that would still be something worthwhile. As it is I'm not sure I'll ever finish the 7ml mini bottle I have. It doesn't make me feel anything, except that it's a waste of an opportunity to be wearing something better.

This would probably be a fine scent to wear in a strict office environment. No one is going to be offended by this; it's unlikely that anyone would notice it at all. You can enjoy yourself while putting it on at home and then by the time you're around other people it'll be a vague ghost.