04/30/2021
SmellsFargo
16 Reviews
SmellsFargo
6
We all scream for...french toast?
today's been the shittiest day of your fucking life; there's just no fucking way around it. your boss reamed you out twice and what makes it worse is that both times were a result of your doing so you had no one else to be mad at but your God damn self. you forgot to put the seal on your lunch and you just happen to pack cod fish salad and over hear everybody complaining that now the entire break room smells like fish, and you're not about to go grab that bag so you join in and be like "who's the dirty mother fucker that stunk up the break room?" and you left your wallet at home, so you can't even go and buy something quick from across the street at that burger stand; so you're just going to eat your thoughts for lunch.
your hard drive crashed and IT department is telling you that you might not be able to recover the files so the case you been working on for your client for the last 2 months might literally be erased off the face of the Earth, even though your work husband Terry told you to save it on a backup drive " you never know". speaking of Terry, you don't know how to interpret his mixed signals and you're not sure if he wants to fuck you or if he's just stroking his own ego. and in the back of your mind you're justifying it because hey you're both married you're both seemingly unhappy with your spouses you both get along great; what's the harm?
the only thing that made this whole fiasco seem worth it was that vacation that you're going to be taking at the end of next week ...well you WERE taking; your boss strolls into your office, I'm sorry, your cubicle and told you that your vacation is going to have to be pushed back and there's no time frame on when that will happen but they will "keep you updated". so you take 10 minutes to go online and cancel your reservation and flight tickets but because you booked this since last October, they charge you a 50% cancellation fee. the fee being so high that now you can't even go anywhere whenever your vacation time actually arrives.
the end of the day comes and you feel awashed with a sense of relief that this hellacious day is almost over. go to your car turn on the engine, before you pull off you think of yourself "what the fuck is this horrendous smell?" you look down and it looks like you stepped in shit and tracked it into the car. you think to yourself "know what I'm just going to go home drink a whole bottle of Pinot grigio take a couple of Xanax and go to bed fuck it". that's when you receive a text from your ex-husband saying that some things come up so he cannot take the kids this weekend and it's at that very moment you feel the strong urge to just swerve your car and send it careening off the overpass.
so you the roll up on the kids school pick them up awaiting for the Armageddon that's about to ensue and surprisingly they're well-behaved. they tell you "hey Mom it's good to see you" and that they actually apologize for their father not being able to pick them up this weekend. and you're stress starts to temper a bit and you decide to maybe start getting the ball rolling and form some momentum so you ask the kids what they want to eat for dinner, you don't feel like cooking (not because you're stressed or overwhelmed but you will not be able to handle the reality of another day of the kids willingly refusing to eat your dinner because you can't cook worth a shit and that would be the straw that broke the camel's back).
so after a surprisingly good Big Mac, the kids ask if you could go take them to the ice cream shoppe and you think to yourself "God damn it it's been years since I've had ice cream". and the wave of nostalgia hits you for when you were a little one so bad, that it almost washed away the crap feeling you've had over yourself for most of the day, keyword: almost. you guys get there with about 20 minutes to spare you ask the staff if it's okay to order since those guys are about to close up in 20 minutes and they cheeringly welcome you to come by and get a couple of scoops.
but then you walk up to the counter, you get on your knees and you begin to have a nervous breakdown; you see they only have rum raisin and pistachio left, the horror. you pull out that revolver in your purse that you've been hoping never to use against someone attempting to assault you, put it to your mouth pull the trigger and end it all.
a whiff of a waffle cone captures that magical feeling and smell when you walk into an ice cream shoppe that makes its own waffle cones on the premises, where it seems like time stands still and life is all good, before you decided to channel your inner Cobain. Josh Myers and the guys over at imaginary authors always throw in this magical fabricated note that you know is impossible but still manage to conjure up a mixture of molecules that evokes that very feeling. that very note in this fragrance is ice cream shop and that is exactly what you smell, from the sweetness to the cream and even the metallic tincture of the machinery.
when people see the art on the box and promo they're going to be have preconceived notions that this ithis is going to smell like ice cream and it doesn't. its definitely a gourmand and to my wonderment, it's not exactly linear. beginning opens up you smell the metal tinctures you smell the cinnamon and the caramel, then the dry down about couple few hours in it turns into this very creamy sugary fragrance that actually kind of smells like French toast. the vanilla is a heavy player in the drydown on my skin.
the longevity on this is rather excellent when you wear it on cool days, as I can get around between 8 to 10 hours. sillage is very good, projection isn't heavy nor do you want it to; this is more of an intimate brunch date or gathering with other people who you're going to be in close proximity to. it's $65 for 50 ml so the values extraordinary. and as the box says when you get it, spray it and spray it liberally: as liberally as Josh Meyer votes.
one of my favorite gourmands, I am hesitant to wear it because this is really a limited edition that's going to be vaulted some point soon so if you can get your hands on this if you love gourmands; this is excellent.
your hard drive crashed and IT department is telling you that you might not be able to recover the files so the case you been working on for your client for the last 2 months might literally be erased off the face of the Earth, even though your work husband Terry told you to save it on a backup drive " you never know". speaking of Terry, you don't know how to interpret his mixed signals and you're not sure if he wants to fuck you or if he's just stroking his own ego. and in the back of your mind you're justifying it because hey you're both married you're both seemingly unhappy with your spouses you both get along great; what's the harm?
the only thing that made this whole fiasco seem worth it was that vacation that you're going to be taking at the end of next week ...well you WERE taking; your boss strolls into your office, I'm sorry, your cubicle and told you that your vacation is going to have to be pushed back and there's no time frame on when that will happen but they will "keep you updated". so you take 10 minutes to go online and cancel your reservation and flight tickets but because you booked this since last October, they charge you a 50% cancellation fee. the fee being so high that now you can't even go anywhere whenever your vacation time actually arrives.
the end of the day comes and you feel awashed with a sense of relief that this hellacious day is almost over. go to your car turn on the engine, before you pull off you think of yourself "what the fuck is this horrendous smell?" you look down and it looks like you stepped in shit and tracked it into the car. you think to yourself "know what I'm just going to go home drink a whole bottle of Pinot grigio take a couple of Xanax and go to bed fuck it". that's when you receive a text from your ex-husband saying that some things come up so he cannot take the kids this weekend and it's at that very moment you feel the strong urge to just swerve your car and send it careening off the overpass.
so you the roll up on the kids school pick them up awaiting for the Armageddon that's about to ensue and surprisingly they're well-behaved. they tell you "hey Mom it's good to see you" and that they actually apologize for their father not being able to pick them up this weekend. and you're stress starts to temper a bit and you decide to maybe start getting the ball rolling and form some momentum so you ask the kids what they want to eat for dinner, you don't feel like cooking (not because you're stressed or overwhelmed but you will not be able to handle the reality of another day of the kids willingly refusing to eat your dinner because you can't cook worth a shit and that would be the straw that broke the camel's back).
so after a surprisingly good Big Mac, the kids ask if you could go take them to the ice cream shoppe and you think to yourself "God damn it it's been years since I've had ice cream". and the wave of nostalgia hits you for when you were a little one so bad, that it almost washed away the crap feeling you've had over yourself for most of the day, keyword: almost. you guys get there with about 20 minutes to spare you ask the staff if it's okay to order since those guys are about to close up in 20 minutes and they cheeringly welcome you to come by and get a couple of scoops.
but then you walk up to the counter, you get on your knees and you begin to have a nervous breakdown; you see they only have rum raisin and pistachio left, the horror. you pull out that revolver in your purse that you've been hoping never to use against someone attempting to assault you, put it to your mouth pull the trigger and end it all.
a whiff of a waffle cone captures that magical feeling and smell when you walk into an ice cream shoppe that makes its own waffle cones on the premises, where it seems like time stands still and life is all good, before you decided to channel your inner Cobain. Josh Myers and the guys over at imaginary authors always throw in this magical fabricated note that you know is impossible but still manage to conjure up a mixture of molecules that evokes that very feeling. that very note in this fragrance is ice cream shop and that is exactly what you smell, from the sweetness to the cream and even the metallic tincture of the machinery.
when people see the art on the box and promo they're going to be have preconceived notions that this ithis is going to smell like ice cream and it doesn't. its definitely a gourmand and to my wonderment, it's not exactly linear. beginning opens up you smell the metal tinctures you smell the cinnamon and the caramel, then the dry down about couple few hours in it turns into this very creamy sugary fragrance that actually kind of smells like French toast. the vanilla is a heavy player in the drydown on my skin.
the longevity on this is rather excellent when you wear it on cool days, as I can get around between 8 to 10 hours. sillage is very good, projection isn't heavy nor do you want it to; this is more of an intimate brunch date or gathering with other people who you're going to be in close proximity to. it's $65 for 50 ml so the values extraordinary. and as the box says when you get it, spray it and spray it liberally: as liberally as Josh Meyer votes.
one of my favorite gourmands, I am hesitant to wear it because this is really a limited edition that's going to be vaulted some point soon so if you can get your hands on this if you love gourmands; this is excellent.
Ilonaslot
