Florgasm Heretic 2018

The opening is quite nice considering I don't always love orange blossom. The citrus is there and it helps to round it out. Quite quickly it fades to nearly nothing on me, though. Within minutes after 2 sprays it's just a whisper of jasmine and orange blossom. It's inoffensive, it's fine, I'm not usually huge on white florals so the quietness is kind of a backwards plus for me. As far as the title goes? I feel like this flower needs someone to wine and dine her properly. I feel like this flower is faking it.

I'm giving it some more time. It strengthens a bit past the initial fade. The ylang-ylang is coming out; it's nice. A bit licorice-y. It does smell a tad like the ethyl hexanoate banana note in Jack Daniels. Pressing my nose to my wrist I actually quite enjoy this. But I mean directly to my wrist. This is a ballroom waltz between orange blossom and ylang-ylang, a squeaky-clean debutante and her slightly sultry suitor. They keep changing up who leads the dance which, to her onlooking over-controlling family, is the pinnacle of scandal. But there's definitely no sneaking off to fuck in the garden.

I mean it smells nice. But for an orgasm, disappointing.

I do not get any citrus from this one, it is very much yellow and white florals all the way. Also, kind of soapy on my skin and not in a good way... I don't think it works for me at all, but the scent is mild and not unpleasant, I just personally dislike prominent yellow florals. Not particularly interesting, Heretic has better fragrances than this.

Breathy floral falsetto, with a film of spray-on sunscreen. Nothing about this bouquet rings animal or carnal to my nose. The loudest and most discernible note is the ylang-ylang, which has a nearly banana-ish tone. But even that plays at a whisper. While longevity and sillage are delicate, it is stalwart for a Heretic. (Stalwart being two hours).

Mental Snapshot: If this is a flower having an orgasm, it’s sputtering out the same pipsqueaky wheeze of a tortoise mounting a garden clog. You know that video. I will not apologise for the visual.

tl;dr: eeeeh eeeeh