Woodsy-fresh recs for a novice interested in niche perfume?

Hi all! I am a perfume novice looking for more recs in my quest to find some signature fragrances. I'd especially love to find something new-to-me that my partner and I could both wear this summer when we get married, to try to have a scent-memory for the day. She likes all the notes I do (plus a few I don't care for like coconut and cucumber 😅)

In general, I prefer unisex fragrances, and a lot of the favorite notes I've been able to identify tend to appear more in men's fragrances. (A former girlfriend joked, pretty accurately, that I like to smell like an elegant old man.) I definitely prefer light-to-medium projections - I'd rather people only really be able to smell me if they come in for a hug or we're sitting right next to each other for a while.  

I currently own a bunch of random little samples, plus Jo Malone's Wood Sage and Sea Salt, Jo Malone Oud and Bergamot, Terre d'Hermes, Hermes Jardin en Mediteranée, Maison Margiela's Jazz Club, and Commodity's Moss. I really like things I've sniffed from Byredo, Diptyque, and Le Labo... but I live in a niche perfume desert, so my chances to do anything except read about niche scents have been limited!

Notes I love: vetiver, cedar, leather, bourbon, pine, rosewood, tea notes, basil, rosemary, lavender, most any spices, rose, magnolia, freesia, any realistic and not-too-sweet fruits (I like it to smell like the freshly washed ripe fruit, not a jammy candy version, if that makes sense?). Other real life smells I adore include wet concrete, mulch, fresh bread, slightly sweaty skin, old books, cat fur, gasoline, and fresh paint .... and man I would love to find weird niche fragrances that included any of those! 

Notes I don't like: Candy-ish gourmands, heavy/complex florals (I prefer just one or two florals in a scent), and anything with strong coconut or cucumber scents are a nope for me. There's also some kind of frequently used base note to some fragrances that turns into a weird, headache-inducing  expired playdough smell on my skin... I have no idea what it is. Some kind of musk that's often used in old-fashioned feminine classics? Chanel No. 5 has it for sure. Whatever it is, I cannot deal. 

Any ideas for me? Thank you so much! 

You might enjoy Calm in Cedar! It's a light, cozy, refreshing wood that I sometimes wear to bed. Congratulations on the upcoming wedding!!! 🥳🥳

Might I suggest Costa Azzurra Eau de Parfum even though it's not a niche scent? My aunt has similar notes she likes as you and she really enjoys that one. It's got the "elegant old man" vibes you're talking about since it's a fougere, but also some nice aquatics which would make it very suitable for summer.

I personally wore "Nio | XerJoff" at my own wedding and honeymoon and have amazing scent memories associated with it. It's a very unique neroli-based freshie with lots of "greenness" and a cardamom note that introduces a different dimension. Might work for you too, I'd consider it unisex.

Just based on the notes you like, maybe try "Elysium Parfum Cologne (Eau de Parfum) | Roja Parfums" or the parfum version Elysium pour Homme Parfum

For years Vetiver Eau de Toilette was my signature scent, so it's safe to say that I also like to smell like an elegant old man

Maybe try those:
Spirito
New York Intense (its better than bottle without 'Intense')
Rhizome 03
Rhizome 02
Vetiver Gris
Lunar Vetiver
Sicilian Leather
Inverness
Lavish

Check also houses (I like most of their scents):
Profumum Roma
Bartnikoff (Their vetivers are very different from others and very very good; they have solid projection so one spray would be enough)
Nishane
DS Durga
Fueguia 1833
Aesop

And coconuts
Paula's Ibiza
Paula's Ibiza Eclectic
Paula's Ibiza Cosmic

So many interesting recs here to follow up on! Thank you!

You should look into Alkemia and Pineward if you haven't come across them yet. Both are fairly affordable and make use of "weird" notes and fantasy accords, but Pineward is more specifically inspired by forests and does some fascinating things with woody scents (e.g. Gristmill) 

You really, really should at least try Jicky Eau de Parfum !!! Maybe not niche, but considering the way it should perform and the notes (lavender, rosemary, spices) and atmosphere you describe as what you like...I think you will love it (but ofcourse try first). Absolutely unisex and so unique, perfect to create a scent memory.

I think what you perceive as playdough, could well be sandalwood by the way. I hardly smell it in Jicky whereas sandalwood usualy is very prominent on my skin, so I think it won't be any problem.

That's not something I usually enjoy but one I tested and was really interesting is:
Bois Impérial Eau de Parfum
Great performance too.